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It's a strange feeling...

...when 2 + 2 = 5

and it's even stranger because you know the calculation makes no mathematical sense, but you bend over backwards trying to defend it, and you manage to convince yourself and everyone around you that it's true.

2 + 2 = 5
Right? Right??!

And everyone, including you, is so convinced that when you really think about it and realise that the answer has to be 4, they think you're the weird pretender.

It's just a strange feeling.

Can anybody lend me a helping hand?

Okay, I'm out of my rut and I feel like writing again.

Problem is....I gots no idea how to post fics up here ('insert confused smiley here')

Yes, I know, I'm a nightmare n00b, but you know what they say n00bs make the world go round.

Yes they do! (n00000bs)
Say it again! (Wooooorld)
They make it go! (Rouuuuund)
The world go round! (Yeahhhhh)
Hallelujah! (Ooooooh)
Praised be jesus! (n000000b)

[/gospel choir]

Right.....so some assistance would be great.

Thanks x


If you're thinking of killing yourself

...you may have fallen victim to the new year blues (I know I have).

January is the most depressing month of the year according to the BBC (therefore we know it must be true). It's like the petit-mort thing after an orgasm. Before you reach climax nothing matters but that golden O when you get there it's awesome for like, a second or two and then after wards you're a mess. Well, I am anyway. You get depressed and think, "oh god how did that happen to me? What the fuck was I thinking?"

That's what the December-January transition is like...December is full of christmas and new years and parties and food and presents and other wonderfully fun things. January is full of clouds and rain and exams and coursework and work in general and broken appliances (this one probably applies to me more than it does to anyone else) and no central heating (ditto) and stress and excess weight that WILL NOT SHIFT, and friends with seemingly perfect lives and other horribly fucking depressing things.

It's a month-long post-orgasmic pile of crap.

And more suicides happen in January than any other month of the year....and death seems to be rife; my neighbour's dog died last night. And my friend's teacher is dead. 

And Heath Ledger is dead.

And Jeremy Beadle is dead.

And a small town in south wales has just seen its seventh (almost its eighth) case of teenaged suicide 

Happy New year.

I'm thinking

That setting up this LJ might have been a complete waste of time.

Firstly I don't understand how to use it at all. There are so many strange technical things that I have absolutely no desire to get to grips with and so many little bits of jargon that I'm never going to get.

Secondly, blogs have always held this weird fascination for me, I've never understood why people felt the need to bare themselves online to absolute strangers and yet have to whilst hiding behind avatars.It feels so safe and so anonymous to construct a whole new identity online, but the whole thing's dangerously personal.

I've always thought that it took a certain type of person to own and constantly update their blog. To expect the rest of humanity to want to read what you write just seems very self-absorbed. But now that I've got one, I can't think like that anymore (well, I'm a hypocrite so I guess I can) and I'm just as bad as everyone else on here, writing all this and expecting people to read and consider my point of view. Strange how it sucks you in, I don't even know who's going to read this or whether anyone wil read it at all but I get the feeling that I'll be here to update it later on, too.

Grrr I don't like this LJ thing; it's a total testimony to the self-centered nature of this generation.

That and it's annoyingly hard to use :P

First Post

I guess this is my first post...
Hmmmm, I probably shouldn't have wasted it on this.
Oh well.
I'm gonna come back after I find out how to get a decent layout on this thing.
That could take some time.



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